discontinuous gut check

Who are we, really? What are we? How are we who we are?
Lately everything's come into question and I've decided to take it up poorly.
Living fits into 2 large categories:
1. we make something happen
2. something happens to us

When during a life large events from both #1 and #2 happen at the same time things get disorienting. You catch yourself thinking about the past and present, unable to speculate regarding the future.
Apparently the future and the unknown are scary. Both #s above involve the unknown. It's why life is sometimes hard- dealing with uncertainty as it plays out into concrete reality can leave a bad taste in your mouth (quite literally perhaps).
I can reason why the fear of the unknown exists. The unknown always poses a challenge: how do you integrate whatever you come to learn into who you previously were in concrete reality? Sometimes this is easy (eg.someone learning to use chopsticks). It is scary when the integration is hard.
Ultimately the unknown is feared from all negative previous experiences. How "negative" is defined matters; bad things can yield goodness and good things can leave you worse off (this is a total crap shoot, it's why some live in the moment so vibrantly only to collapse when the lights of emotion die through reflection).
Basically we fear the unknown because of what we know. Knowledge here is a serious hindrance towards progress/'progress'/growth/'growth'/development/'development'. . . funny how that language has been appropriated and how insidiously it's now used. Maybe we should fear what we know instead; recognizing the enemy, you'd think people would act against it or a least fear it. . . acceptance of what we know might be the biggest problem for people.

The future differs from the unknown in one way: the unknown carries with it unlimited possibilities, the future's are limited. That's why people are afraid of the future: they see their own limitations, how what they've done or who they are will stop them from pursuing some rarefied existence. Whereas there is some uncertainty, there's also the condemning reality of the past that collides with a person's future at every minute of the present. The future isn't scary per se but rather angst-ridden. No matter how bright your future, there will always be some once-dreamed collateral damage resulting from acceptance of what you know.

Now what happens when someone accepts that the unattainable isn't just a creation of yourself, that 'having things happen to you' on a larger scale already contains ingrained, totalitarian oppression? What happens when the unattainable is totally a product of what you know; what happens when the opposite of the unknown oppresses us into fear of the unknown, hiding it's power for change under our own insecurities? What happens when you look around you and see reality and stop believing that change is your fundamental job?
When you start fearing the known, renouncing that which is and refusing the limits of the future you're getting somewhere. It's when you decide that the above #s (1 & 2) don't matter, when you feel apart from them, apart from 'yourself', distantly precipiced, in front of an unknown truly without bounds, an unknown 'you' could never have known, one that evades any label.
In front of that future, why worry? After all, 'you' aren't even there. 'You' are dead amidst the known fear mongering world. 'You' have ceased to be.